How to Stop the Never-Ending Grief…
The answer is… don’t try to stop it. It will go at its own time. Some people mourn for a few days, and others for a few years. Nobody has set a deadline, last time I checked. Just like when you severely injure yourself… can you will the bruises away?
I wish we could, of course. The date on this post is wrong, since I’m only rewriting a Squarespace template, but you bet I went through a heartbreak in 2019; my heart aches every year. And so it is this year, 2026. I get attached to people easily, usually before they even realize I believe we're already in a relationship. Then they leave without a trace, aka ghost, and I’m left abandoned and in shock. But … the harsh reality is that some people, mostly males in my experience, take a long time before they decide to commit. No matter how many times you guys slept together, he probably still regards himself as a single man, and perhaps is still holding auditions for a girlfriend - sleeping with you, but still dating others. Maybe it’s not wrong. But if you expect too much too soon, you are setting yourself up for an injury. Still, you should absolutely expect a lot in a relationship. Don’t settle for their bare minimum. But some men do not want a relationship with you. Should we keep it in our pants until they seem ‘really in love’? But we always do that. People wear masks, and usually know how to get others hooked before they themselves are hooked - or they might be players - and players only love you when they’re playing… So, just have your wits about you for as long as possible, which means stay sober and yes, keep it in your pants till you know what you’re looking for, and if this person can give it to you.
Now suppose that you have been in a committed romantic relationship that has gone awry. You both no longer even hear each other’s point. It’s a win-lose game, and everyone wants to be the winner, aka right. I think you can still salvage it. I recommend the book Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson. What are the deeper needs behind your fights?
If you’ve recently been betrayed, abandoned, or rejected, check out my latest video. You’re not alone, and I’ve got you.